Fathers Day is this coming Sunday, in recognition of that, I wanted to write down some thoughts that have been on my mind.
I see you Dad….
I see you Dad, with the love of your life, the one you chose. I see you holding her as she cries after another negative test. I see you, holding her hand as she listens to the Dr. talk about all the things you may have to try. I see you spending late nights reading, and researching, and trying to find out why or how he can become a daddy, I see you. I see you holding her hand and lifting her up, through what can feel like an impossible climb
I see you Dad, with a broken heart, as you hear “I’m sorry, there’s no heart beat” or she tells you she’s lost the pregnancy. I see your hurt and your strength. I see you hoping and wishing you could bring it back.
I see you Dad, holding her hair back when shes sick, morning after morning, I see you at the grocery store at 2 am because she woke up and just HAD to have that ice cream…you know the baby wanted it. I see you looking up every carseat, crib, monitor, and anything and everything he can find to keep his baby safe
I see you Dad, terrified and excited, as you watch her labor to bring your child into this world. I see you holding her hand, rubbing her back, telling her she can do it.
I see you Dad, the moment you become a dad. I see you with that tiny little baby on your chest, the one who you can hold in one hand. I see you, nervous, but so very proud
I see you Dad, rocking a crying newborn, when she just can’t take it anymore. I see your rubbing shoulders while she nurses, making bottles, washing bottles, changing diapers, talking to a wide awake baby…doing whatever you can do to share the load and give her a break.
I see you Dad, learning and growing, and trying to figure out how to transition from partner to dad and helping her transition from wife to mama, and back to those roles as lovers and not just parents
I see you Dad, as you come home from work to a messy house, and frazzled hair, and a toddler who can’t wait to tell you about his day.
I see you Dad, as you quietly pick up after a long day, when it’s just been too much. I see you, not saying anything, and then telling her to go relax, while you put the kids to bed
I see you Dad, learning how to do ponytails and braids, how to pack lunches, and figure out how you’ll do this on your own
I see you Dad, playing with your kids, running and jumping, and climbing and throwing.
I see Dad, you watching, spending every moment you can soaking in this time. Knowing that it will pass all too quickly. I see you wishing you didn’t have to leave for work, yearning to spend every moment with your family.
I see you Dad, being patient, and kind, and compassionate, and strong, and loving
I see you Dad, and you’re doing strong work. We love you and couldn’t do it without you.
Every dad’s journey is different, yet all are so important.
Whatever stage you’re in, rather you’re doing it alone, or with a wife or your baby’s are grown or you’re still waiting to hear those words you’re gonna be a dad!”….please know that we see you, and we think you’re doing a darn good job.
As a mama (and wife), I know how hard it is to get wrapped up in the world and role of mama. But don’t forget your partner, tell him you love him and you see him, and remind him how much you need him. Because one day, you won’t hear little voices calling you mama and daddy, when its quite and all the chaos settles, he’ll still be there holding your hand.
Don’t forget to see dad <3